Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Birthing...A New Relationship

I can't remember exactly when this book waltzed into my life...but it has become one of those cherished books I give out as presents. It's called Intellectual Foreplay and if you can get past the title, it's definitely worth a look.

My husband and I didn't do premarital counseling... but we did go through this book extensively before we wed. When we first met, I mentioned the book...his eagerness (to share his answers and listen to mine) was very attractive. We poured over all the chapters together.

It's a terrific book to use during the infatuation stage of a relationship (when people often overlook their serious differences). The questions in this book will probably bring up some differences you may not have discovered...yet. The more information...the better, right?

Some couples who have been married for 20 years have happily utilized this book as a way to reconnect. It's also a fantastic way for families to have meaningful, heart-felt conversations during long car rides. It's definitely not just a book for those newly met.

The book is divided into chapters like....Self-Esteem, Communication, Entertainment/Sports/Hobbies, Morals/Values/Ethics/Beliefs, Time, Education/Intelligence, Past, Future, Household Responsibilities/ Habits, Bathroom, Plants and Garden, Holidays, and Children...to name a few.

Here are a few randomly selected questions...

When are you happiest?

Who or what controls your life?

How do you tend to give criticism?

Do you consider your mail and email private?

Are you good about keeping in touch with friends?

Where do you like to sit in a movie theater?

How do you feel about television in the bedroom?

Is if ever okay to lie?

Do you set watches and clocks fast or the actual time?

What do you consider a waste of time?

What were your major sources of joy growing up?

At what age do you believe "old age" begins?

How often do you change the sheets?

What is your morning and evening ritual?

Where do you leave your used dental floss?

Do you talk to your plants?

What's your favorite birthday cake?

What do you consider quality time with a child?

If you are in the beginning stages of a relationship, why not start off on the right foot and began interjecting some of these questions into all those endless late-night discussions? For the rest of us...here's a terrific way to spice up Dinner Time!

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